Pilot

First Class Blonde

A plane is on its way to Melbourne when a blonde in Economy Class gets up and moves to the First Class section and sits down.

The flight attendant watches her do this and asks to see her ticket. She then tells the blonde passenger that she paid for Economy and that she will have to go and sit in the back.

The blonde replies, “I’m blonde, I’m beautiful, I’m going to Melbourne and I’m staying right here!”

The flight attendant goes into the cockpit and tells the pilot and co-pilot that there is some blonde sitting in First Class that belongs in Economy and won’t move back to her seat.

The co-pilot goes back to the blonde and tries to explain that because she only paid for Economy she is only entitled to an economy place and she will have to leave and return to her original seat.

The blonde replies, “I’m blonde, I’m beautiful, I’m going to Melbourne and I’m staying right here!”

Exasperated the co-pilot tells the pilot that it was no use and that he probably should have the police waiting when they land to arrest this blonde woman that won’t listen to reason.

The pilot says, “You say she’s blonde? I’ll handle this, I’m married to a blonde, and I speak blonde!”

He goes back to the blonde, whispers in her ear, and she says, “Oh, I’m sorry - I had no idea,” gets up and moves back to her seat in the economy section.

The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and ask him what he said to make her move without any fuss.

The Pilot replies, “I told her First Class isn’t going to Melbourne.”

The Blonde Stewardess

An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a stay-over in another city, so upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight. The next morning as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day’s route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened to her.

She answered the phone, sobbing, and said she couldn’t get out of her room.

“You can’t get out of your room?” the captain asked, “Why not?”

The stewardess replied, “There are only three doors in here,” she cried, “one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says, 'Do Not Disturb!'”

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